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| ~*GASP*~
that's right....
she's back!
So life has been crazy and sexy and exciting and exhausting and stressful and hopeful and phenominal in the last few months. I am happier than I've ever thought I could be, I'm more frazzled than I've ever been, I'm not as organized as I wish I was and far busy than I ever expected to be.
I have found an amazing guy, who never ceases to amaze me with his intelligence and charm. He knows me- so well- from my strengths to my insecurities, my passions to my weaknesses. He is witty and mature, warm and forgiving. He makes me laugh, and knows how to make me smile. He can read me, knows what I want with a single look... be it a kiss or his opinion on my newest hair style. He knows his own passions and although he may not know exactly what path to take to get to his dreams, he knows what he wants.
Hs is so intelligent, and sensitive. Unlike any man I've ever known. (except for maybe my father...)
I have been working a lot, as usual, however.... drum roll please... I quit my job at Hooters yesterday... I just became fed up with the lack of mutual respect from the management. I have been working a new job, for which I travel with a sprint car racing organization and at each race I sell merchandise. This is just mainly t-shirts, sweaters, jackets, hats, decals, and programs... this is the company I work for: www.allstarsprint.com and if you check out All Star Merchandise you can see some of the pictures I did for the online merchandising! I get paid really well, and I am really excited about the week from the 23rd to the first of July... I will be travelling for nine days (we call it the Ohio Speedweek) and hopefully I will make quite a bit financially. However it'll be hard to be away from my sweetheart for so long...
I also work at a bar just off campus in downtown Champaign. It is a really awesome job, I get to dress really classy and serve fun looking martinis and we have live bands every weekend and it's just a really relaxed atmosphere. My boss is dating one of my coworkers... which is pretty weird considering the ten year (or so) difference in their ages, but other than that I have no qualms with the management. Its really nice because I work in the beer garden (outside) so I get to enjoy the beautiful summer nights even when I am working. The downside to this is that, well, I do live in ILLINOIS, and the weather isn't always wonderful.... so if its raining I am out of work for a night... but that can be a good thing as well so its a pretty awesome summer job.
I also recently put up a profile on www.OneModelPlace.com... if you click on the banner for it you can see my little 'portfolio'. (what is really insane is that my site has been hit over 4,000 since I set it up on like the 9th!!! CRAZY) I am still quite the amateur but I have been contacted by a ton of photographers wanting to do TFP/CD (time for prints/cd) which means that they take pictures of me to build their own portoflio, but I also get prints, or a cd of all the prints, in exchange so that I build my portfolio as well. It is a really nice system for amateurs because I don't have the money to be paying a photographer to take pictures so that I build my portfolio (which in turn gives me more opportunity to get paid jobs).
I am mainly doing this on the side of the rest of my life, I love it and its exciting but I don't plan on making a career out of it... unless my portfolio grows into something quite impressive... in that case I might pursue it more seriously. (and don't worry, I plan on taking a friend with me to every shoot.)
In other news of the world of kayt... I bought a laptop!!! It is a beaut! 120 gigs of harddrive, 1 gig of RAM, widescreen, beautiful dark silver finish, dvd burning capabilities, altogether a phenominal peice of hardware. I love her. Her name is Laelah. hahaha
Aside from that, I'm still me, just swimmin upstream tryin to appreciate my experiences and pad up my little nest egg of savings.
I'm really excited about moving to Austin in August... the best part of which is that my sweetheart will be coming down about a month later, to pursue his Electrical Engineering career and a relationship with me! yay! It's a beautiful thing to be with someone that is willing to sacrifice for you, try new things, broaden their horizons so that you have an even more common understanding of life together. He's just a great guy. He has completely won my heart, and my trust- in an amazingly tender and gentle way that no one ever has before.
Oh one other tidbit of news!!! I am getting KITTENS!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEHEHE! Two little baby Siamese applehead lovelies! I plan on gettin a little boy and a little girl and loving them forever! lol, but really... they are still just babies... but hopefully in the first week of july I will be able to go down to the St. Louis area and pick out the two (from the litter) that I want... and then around the last week of July I'm hoping to be able to pick them up and bring them home! ***don't worry dad, I won't bring them to your place. dan has agreed to take care of them until I get my own place***
So yeah, thats the gist of it... I love all of you and hope to touch base with my loved ones here in Illinois again soon before I move back to Texas. Thanks for your prayers and keep me up to date with the goings on in your lives!
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| ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!
oh the liquor will flow tonight! | | |
| This was part of a prompt for a paper i just wrote for philosophy..... and my response...
"How would your life look when standing in the vicinity of death?"
Although I could say my life would look practically meaningless when standing in the vicinity of death- I can't imagine anyone who wouldn't feel the same way. Even the greatest contributor to social well being will be forgotten; even the greatest inventor will become insignificant- eventually. What is there in life that could hold its own against the ideal of death? What could possibly make someone feel as though they 'did their part' or accomplished all they could? The fact of the matter is that we are all human, we all make mistakes and we all have regrets. No one has lived their life perfectly and I don't believe anyone is completely satisfied. So, therefore, how can any life seem significant in the acknowledgement of death? How can any person feel completely content with their life? If one has given all they had to the poor- if they were to walk but a distance they would find more people in need. If one were to acquire great amounts of wealth- and all of their materialistic goals: what is the good, when those things will remain after they are gone? Life can be lived a million different ways, but not one way can be completely pleasing and fulfilling because humans are erroneous- and mistakes are inevitable. Life will always be tainted in the shadow of death- life will always be incomplete because we are prone to err, and therefore can never be satisfied when looking death in the eye. | | |
| i'm so tired.
can't wait for my night in effingham with jenn.
*sigh*
**edit**
aww jenn i <3 u.
clare- remember this crazy child?
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| what a shitty life im living.
gotta get outta this rut.
havin a rough time- love you all tho.
need to sort some stuff out in my head.
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